Did You Eat Yet?

I've come to notice the presence of a common greeting in Chinese culture, and I am told that other East Asian cultures also possess greetings of similar nature.
The greeting that I am referring to is "Did You Eat Yet?"

Oftentimes when I call my parents, if it is within one or two hours of regular meal times (roughly between 11 and 2 for lunch and 5-8 for dinner), I would usually ask them, "Did you eat yet?" It would be used instead of the more American counterparts such as "How's it going?" or "What's up?" Family members, friends, business associates, and many other people will ask each other "Did you eat yet?" when they meet each other.

To the Chinese mind (at least mine), this phrase can be considered a vivid representation of the passionate yet restrained affection Chinese people have for each other. To ask someone “Did you eat yet?” is to inquire whether life has been prosperous and good. Underneath the surface of this simple interrogative we find a recurring narrative that rings through China’s ancient history as well as the hearts of its people.

“The first priority of the people is food,” goes the Chinese proverb. Food is not only tied to the people’s survival, but also their morale, prosperity, and contentment. Historically, the reign of notorious tyrants is accompanied by wide spread famine and disease, which eventually leads to invasion, war, rebellion, and chaos. On the other hand, when rulers reign justly and provide a sound social structure in which the people can live (their bellies full and the hearts happy), there is peace and prosperity. Not only do people with full belly mean adequate nourishment, it also implies a general sense of personal wellbeing as well as the overall welfare of the entire nation. By inquiring whether someone has eaten yet, you are asking not simply did he or she have a meal, but also whether they have been living a happy and prosperous life.

Today in this modern, fast-paced, individualized society of ours, there are accusations of a loss of authenticity against people who greet each other in passing without really caring or wanting to know how the other person is doing. We no longer care, because in the world of the American Dream, our individual lives are no longer dependent on the whit and whims of a single person. If you’re not doing well, that implies an inherent error within your existence and the way you live your life. Therefore, rather than deeply caring for the someone’s troubles because it is a experience that we share in common, we cease to care to hear about the misfortunes of others because it is the disease of failure that we want to dissociate ourselves with.

As people who are called to bare the burdens of others, we need to counteract the tendency to brush off other people’s lives and judge them by the condition that they are in. Instead, we must understand that our lives are often in shambles due to reasons beyond our own control, and that the fabled American Dream is a dream and not truth. Let us relearn how to deeply care for our brothers and sisters who so desperately need our attention. Let us remember that we are not simply individuals along in this world in control of our own fates, but we are all vessels of God’s love and so intimately tied together in His plan that when someone suffers all suffers. And when someone goes hungry, that should mean to us just as it does in Chinese culture a deep set injustice within our social structure so that even a person’s basic need of sustenance is denied. And when we come to that point, God grant us the grace to stand up and fight against the structures that perpetuate those injustices.